Emma Bishop is an English spanko and lives in the Midlands/South East area of England. You may know of her spanking adventures from her website The Trouble with Emma. I caught up with Emma in October 2009…
Hi Emma, I’ve just been reading your blog. What is your spanking school?
Spanking school? Well, I think in my blog that’s a turn of phrase when I talk about having mentoring i.e. ‘going back to school’? It’s not an actual place but a situational state. I have had on/off periods when I was ‘back at school’ and it’s about having that discipline.
I know you’ve said that you do a lot of improvisation, when you are playing do you trust the other person enough to just roll with it from the outset? Or do you say in advance what you’re going to do?
That’s a great question! I have been so very lucky with the people I have worked with, and those I have seriously role played with in that without exception all have been natural leaders. Playing opposite a strong authoritative person naturally gets me into my space and I’m so ‘there’. My job is easy, who wouldn’t be with such great actors to play alongside 🙂 Yes, I trust them because I am strong on trusting my instincts and going with the flow. I never rely on a script but just feelings and my method acting style.
Can you tell me a bit about the UK spanking scene?
The scene? Well, I’m not really a scenie. I go to events and parties but its most often social or some kind of PR for me. Here goes though… My view is that the UK scene is probably more open than most. There are forums such as British Spanking, Fetlife, Informed Consent and ALT. People can buddy up either online or pop along to a munch (daytime meal/drink in a vanilla setting) or, go to an organized non-professional party run by shared kinksters. On the professional side, there are private 121’s pretty much as the oldest trade has always been (lol!), and parties run on a professional basis. Additionally the girls appear in spanking movies and photo shoots. Now is that enough info for a non UK person?!
Oh, I went to a party in Copenhagen once when I was shooting there and it was VERY cloak and dagger like something out of ‘Allo Allo’ lol!!
Or like Eyes Wide Shut?
Haven’t seen that yet, Nicole Kidman?
Yeah, and Tom Cruise, the book’s good too. Check it out.
Yes I will, if its anything like The Secretary (which I can bore you for ages about parallels and how spooked I was when I saw it), then I’m sure it will touch a nerve!
Wow, cool, I DO want to ask u about The Secretary but first, how did u get to go to a cloak and dagger spanking party in Denmark?
I was doing a shoot there and my friend/associate at the time managed to find out about a club on the outskirts of town. It was more of a BDSM type party but run by people who knew each other really well, very much like a family type atmosphere in a village hall lol! When we got there we were quizzed on who tipped us off, how we knew them etc and eventually managed to talk ourselves in.
It felt like being in an old style western though being looked at like “Hey Sheriff, lookey here, there’s a stranger in town!” (hee hee)
[They had some] some good props, spanking benches etc, like a play room in a small BDSM club anywhere really. Apart from the skæreost lol (just kidding!!) That’s Danish cheese 🙂
Did you like that party?
Well, I had a bit to drink and we played semi privately. I was tied to a stand and it was more erotic play, light flogging etc, and of course the cane. We got invited back and to their Summer Camp but I haven’t been able to go. [It’s] a nice memory now.
Now you’re a part of their community, cool. Sounds like fun! Do you like BDSM as well?
I’ve been embroiled in oh-so-long debates about what constitutes ‘BDSM’. At one time I said I was only into spanking and can still clearly see a line between BDSM and DD (Domestic Discipline). I am more heavily in the DD camp but over the past few years have dabbled into BDSM territory. Things like hot candle wax, Estim machines, pony play and bondage. When I tried them I giggled and had great fun. I’d always thought of it as being heavy and that I had to be deadly serious and in the headspace. Once I realized it is also about relaxation and that I can also relax and enjoy it as an experience, it was easier. Now I am curious and admit I like a bit more of it!
BUT.. I’m not a slut/slave victim or doormat guys so please, no more lewd attempts to get me to turn 🙂 That goes to a few who have dated me and one in particular who asked me if id mind having shit thrown at me, as his previous slave loved it!!
The secretary is one of those iconic movies, I’ve seen the poster everywhere, but I’ve never watched the movie. Were you into spanking when you first saw it?
Oh by far, hell yes! But, I didn’t realize that I had had ‘the secretary’ experience myself until I saw it in the film. The moment when she waits for him to come back and punish her, and waits, and waits. I cried when I saw it and was shaking, it was a weird experience like “OMG that happened to me, I know EXCATLY what she is feeling! He didn’t come and a denial experience like that is one of the most painful things that has ever happened to me as a submissive.
I’m going to buy that DVD on Amazon today, does she get spanked?
Ok, look out for that moment. Yes, but the spanking looks very un-authentic. To the viewer it is erotic enough to hear it and know it’s going on but to any experienced spankophile we all know it was heavily staged. Maggie Gyllenhaal is actually a great actress, I have seen her in movies since and I admire her for taking that part she was superb in it and got the character and her feelings and emotions spot on.
I would have love that part since I have now acted a lot more for real.
Emma gets the riding crop from Donna Davenport at Northern Spanking
You mention acting, how’s that going?
Slow lol!! I don’t have a time limit on anything but will take every chance I ever get. It’s rather like being an Olympic athlete, staying in training and being prepared are the most important tools. It is the hardest thing to break into though. As someone said.. “Acting is a terrible way to make a living but a wonderful way to live a life” ..So true!
As for spanking movies, I am always ready for the call but am not out there chasing them. I hope my so called bad girl reputation goes before me and that is enough of a challenge 🙂
Think Katherina and Petruchio haha
Hehe. Your first ever spanking was with a retired headmaster who placed an ad for girls to spank. At the time, had you had thoughts about spankings, and just saw an ad in a paper or online? Or had you started talking to other spankos?
I had always had thoughts about it, but all private. I thought it was something not to talk about and didn’t know there was a whole world of people into it. I guessed that if people were advertising then it must be relatively safe as they probably had to give their personal details to be able to post an Ad. I was very naive for a long time and looking back got into some scrapes that could have been hairy but thankfully I only ever met lovely safe trustworthy souls 🙂
That’s good! So, reading some of your answers it seems to me that the scared feeling, is a big part of spanking for you.
It is the height of the whole experience for me, but it has to feel real, or else I draw on my training to trigger it. When I really am scared, I am there in a personal way and it affects me such that I take a long time to come down afterwards. That’s has only happened a few times in my career but that’s as it should be, Special moments by their nature need something far out to make them happen.
Leia Ann Woods is on the other end of the cane. “I admire and love her work, although to say much as Ms. Woods is deadly with a cane I prefer to see her getting hers!” Photo courtesy of Northern Spanking
I know that you weren’t spanked growing up but that you recall one time when your dad took off his belt and that was all you needed to be good. So, I guess as a child, and when your dad took off his belt, that made you scared, and stuck with you so when u saw the ad you had to respond.
Yes it was the taking off of the belt feeling. The waiting, the telling off, the anticipation, the not knowing, that is the most real experience anyone can have I think.
So it is scary, but it’s also a safe scary, so you know that whatever happens you’re going to be ok. It’s not like crossing the road blindfolded.
Well at the moment I don’t look that far ahead and remind myself it is just ‘play’. If I did I would lose a lot and I doubt it would all appear as ‘real’ as it really is for me at the time. When I tremble, cry before punishment, scratch my skin and wrangle with my hands so hard they are marked when I am waiting for punishment , it is all what I am really going through. These things have actually happened so I am not going to pretend I am a great actress. The difference is that now I know how to make it happen in the same way if the other person isn’t able to bring that out of me.
But I have never used a safeword if that what you mean.
Ok. Coming down from the high, is that the subdrop? How long does it take and how does it feel?
That depends on who, what, when and how.. OMG hard to quantify. In my most serious moments, I have been found outside the room crying, sometimes in a chair or wherever I may fall, often on the floor in a heap and being inconsolable. That has scared people who I have worked/played with who of course genuinely care about me. I can’t help it though and hate myself sometimes for being too serious about it all but the cathartic release from it is something I need at that time so I have to have that space. When it happened to me in a serious acting role and I came out of a performance and had to say goodbye to a character I grew to love, I cried a lot the next day. I know now it isn’t about being spanked, or pain.
Do u like implements? What’s your favourite implement?
OTK hand spanking always, but only when its given ‘right’. The cane I love now as it tests me, but I hate it when it doesn’t feel right, it feels like I have been deprived. I’m not so into heavy straps, just things that sting more, and absolute not into deep bruising.
I know that you were once dommed by Leia Ann Woods, what was that like?
Lol yes Leia. The movie isn’t out yet and I’m not sure if/when it will be but it was something that surprised me. The gorgeous Leia, an absolute icon in the scene, taking on a role I didn’t expect her to be in with me. As it happens, and I told her this at the time, she is an expert with a cane and one of the best. I was soooo surprised but that is the benefit of good training, I think, and also she has the advantage of being a naturally brilliant actress.
Generally do u prefer men or women to domme you?
Men or women? Well, I loved watching Miss Brown in the Red Stripe videos and she is someone I would love to have worked with because she has what it takes to get me in the moment I think. Lucy McLean was fantastic too and as she spoke to me and told me she was ‘telling my parents’. I was sooo in the moment. She also knew what and how to do it all. I can mention three other brilliant women I’ve been dommed by who have totally done it for me in terms of finding my headspace. Sorry I’m rambling but I think as long at there is authority, control and getting me to know my place with them then I can be there with both….fence sitting I know but hey!!
Is spanking a sexual thing for you?
Easy to answer. Erotic, but the level of that is based on the other person, and sensuous. Sexual? If that means do I want to have sex with the person afterwards then I’d have to say “No”. The sexual bit comes later when I’m thinking about it, nursing a sore bottom or sent to my room 🙂 I clearly separate spanking and sex but that doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy it.
So, you get sent to your room, think about it and get turned on, then you want to maybe have sex with your partner (not necessarily the person who spanked you)?
Well, nothing is in any particular order lol and I can’t say that I always feel sexy after every spanking but if I do I can safely say I would only want to have sex with my serious and lovely boyfriend 🙂 Definitely not on camera though in a movie!
For more on Emma Bishop check out these links…